4 Ways Every Man Should Kiss His Girl

kissy2

Every girl — Every. Single. One — wants to be kissed just right. They want that kiss that will blow their minds; that kiss that will make their toes curl. Guys, think of the kiss as a prelude to things to come… if you do it right, then you’ll get to the second base. But if you do it wrong… well, that can just ruin a night, not to mention puncture your ego. You need to understand that different situations call for different kinds of kisses… you need to know this, because, again, failure to, can ruin your chances forever.

1. The Soft, Gentle Kiss

You’re with a girl you really like and you know that she wants to be kissed just as much as you want to kiss her. You’ve been waiting for this moment. You want to take it slow, this girl is special. Take a mental step back and relax, the last thing you want is to appear too eager… too hungry. There are times when being hungry is ideal but if you read the situation wrong, you’re going to end up getting the side of her cheek. On the way to her home after a date, when you pull up in the driveway… before she gets out of the car, slowly lean in, and kiss her ever so softly … no tongue. Don’t be a puppy and slobber all over her face.

2. The Urgent Kiss

Sometimes the soft gentle kiss just won’t cut it. You’re at a get together and all evening you’ve been craving some alone time. When she gets up to replenish her drink, excuse yourself to use the bathroom… or wherever… and head to the kitchen instead. Tap her on her shoulder and as she turns around to face you, take her by the shoulders and shove her against the fridge. Mould your body into hers… Now is the time to kiss her deeply and quickly — leave her gasping for breath. Note, this doesn’t mean shoving your tongue down her throat and choking the life out of her!

3. The Hungry Kiss

You really want this girl and she wants you. Having dinner at the fancy restaurant with her knees brushing against yours all evening, and she touching your arm was enough foreplay. Now she’s at your place and you want her. Pull her towards you, fitting your body into hers and hungrily devour her lips… deepening the kiss as your tongues play.

4. The ‘After’ Kiss

You’ve both just had a wild night and now she’s lying on top of you, satiated. Hold her cheeks between your palms and guide her face down to yours. Tenderly kiss her on the forehead, on the nose… nibble on her lower lip, then tease her. Things may just heat up again.

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6 Things That Creepy Guys Do At Work

work

Chances are, at some stage during your work life, you’ll come across the office pervert. He’s the guy that all the women try to avoid. The sleaze. The one who will watch porn on company time. The one with the salacious look who visually mauls you when he sees you in the corridor. The guy who sends shivers down your spine … and not the good kind of shivers either … the make-you-feel-sick kind. He has many aliases but his modus operandi is always the same — he invades your personal space. He makes you uncomfortable.

1. He likes to get physically close:

The new software is a bit difficult to understand; so you ask for help. He comes over. He’s explaining what the different features on the computer are and instead of pulling up a chair, he stands behind you and proceeds to encircle you from behind. You can almost feel his breath on your ear as he leans in. Ugh. You have visions of ‘accidentally’ rolling back your chair … hard … where it hurts … smiling innocently and saying, “Oh no!”, and then offering him your seat.

2. He sends you text messages

It irks you when he sends a message like “We should do lunch sometime”. He knows that you have a boyfriend, or that you’re not interested, but he doesn’t care. He thinks it worth a shot. If he was a stranger, you could easily block his number, but due to circumstances… you’re forced to think of ways to subtly dismiss his intentions.

3. He tries to play in your hair:

You finally scored an appointment with that great hairstylist and your hair is looking fab. You’re mouthing off to the girls at the water cooler telling them how your toes curl to have your stylist in your hair. He passes by and stops. Clearly he overheard what you were saying as he makes an attempt to stroke your hair. You think to yourself that now would be a good time to act startled, spilling the cup of water in your hand, on him. Oops.

4. He tries to cop a feel:

It’s your birthday and hugs are going around. You can see him out of the corner of your eye, furtively awaiting his turn. This is the guy who when he looks at you, creeps you out. Do you really want him to hug you?? Hit snooze on the panic button as you envision yourself waiting until there are about two or three people ahead of him, and looking mortified as you exclaim, “Oh shit! I forgot to …” Then, running out the room, and coming back in a minute or two after, knowing that the hug fest will be over.

5. He attempts to touch your ass:

You just shouted for them to hold the elevator, raced in, and discovered that not only is it jam packed, but he’s standing there … damn it! It’s a tight squeeze in the elevator and he’s going to capitalize on it. You can sense it. This is his golden opportunity… and he knows it. But if as the doors begin to close, you sniffle, then sneeze loudly, chances are people will move away and make room for you to shift. And when they back away, you’ll have gained some extra standing room.

6. He makes inappropriate comments

He makes salacious comments about your work outfit. When he looks suggestively at you, flirts with you, and has the audacity to refer to your breasts… this will make you very uncomfortable. Now, you may not put him in his place because you’re trying to avoid making things awkward. But if he continues to do this… you will snap one day. And, at that point, no one can save him.

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9 Things All Couples Have To Remember Once They Fall In Love

frenchkiss

This piece was first published on Thought Catalog, on July 29, 2015.

1.  Keep falling for each other. Act like you’re at the top of Rick’s Cafe on a cliff in Jamaica, nervously peeping over the edge, and jump off. Fall deeper and harder for each other every day. Live the best free-falling life with the person you love, until it ends—when that chapter closes, or somebody dies.

2.  Make real plans with your partner, not the things society tells you to plan (e.g. your wedding, pregnancy, and home ownership). Screw society’s idea of what your life should look like, and those banks that approve high interest rate mortgages. Instead, plan a day trip or a road trip or decide to buck convention altogether. Focus on what you actually want as a couple, not what you’re supposedto want.

3.  Eat healthy and take care of your bodies so you can live 50 more years with the person you love.

4.  Kiss each other daily. If you kiss each other daily for the next 50 years, that’s 18,250 smooches to look forward to. (Finally, we can apply math to a real life situation!)

5.  Schedule date nights and get drunk and silly together. Quality time leads to meaningful conversations. Ask each other about your days, jobs, passions, etc. Check in with each other. Never assume you already know everything, no matter how much time passes.

6.  Don’t forget to be spontaneous. After dinner, take her out on the town and dance the night away. Stay out too late, until the DJ starts playing Celine Dion (read: until the party is over and it’s time to go home).

7.  Celebrate special occasions. That doesn’t have to mean a fancy dinner or spending excessive amounts of money. It means being thoughtful about commemorating birthdays and anniversaries and honoring traditions. Go to a lookout point in the hills overlooking the city, or play some romantic music and dance in each other’s arms at home.

8.  Stay up late just to talk. Learn each other’s insecurities. Talk about them directly. Make each other feel beautiful and love, in spite of and because of your flaws.

9.  Make love regularly, even when you’re both exhausted. Sex will keep you close. Look into each other’s eyes after and feel each other’s heartbeats. Know each other. Recognize that you need each other—that you take each other’s breath away, quite literally. Still. Even after all those years

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 Any picture featured on this site unless otherwise stated, I claim no credit for. The use of images are for aesthetics only and are taken from various websites. If there is a picture that belongs to you and is not credited, please contact me (chris.paul.lai@gmail.com). I will either credit it or remove it. 

 

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When A Man Fails In The Bedroom; Here’s What His Girl Can Do

bed2

Listen up ladies. We are under a lot pressure to perform in bed, more than you can ever imagine. And the pressure intensifies when it’s the first night we’re making love to you. Trust me, we don’t want to disappoint, and we understand it takes work to give you a mind-blowing orgasm. We also have monstrous egos, so we can’t afford for you to tell your bestie “Ugh… he was awful in bed.”

Gentlemen… the reality is this… you could be a CEO, a professional athlete, a doctor, a thug, a construction worker… at some point; you’ve been in a position where your dick failed you.

So if you’re a young man and you recently experienced this embarrassing moment, you should know that it happens to the best of us. It’s not the end of the world. Sure, you’ll feel like shit but you can’t let that dampen your mood or worse… affect future performances.

Now, there are a number of reasons for this failure. But for crying out loud, ladies, please stop assuming that it has anything to do with your physical appearance. There’s no need to add to the disappointment… it will only make things worse. We have a lot of things going on in our heads… and it may have nothing to do with your breasts, nothing to do with your breath, and nothing to do with down there.

We could be really attracted to you, but on the day, our dick just won’t stay up. And, as you can imagine, this is the most frustrating thing ever.

Perhaps, we were too eager to deliver an epic performance. We spent all day thinking about you.

Another possibility is that we may be lacking in confidence. And this spells trouble. If you even manage to get it up, it’s impossible to hit all the right spots if you’re not in the vibe. Even if you’re a beast in bed, if your confidence is low, you’ll be as useless as Gonzalo Higuain.

And yeah, we could also be nervous. Maybe you have a good feeling about this girl, and you don’t want to mess things up. Or maybe you think she’s out of your league. Or maybe you think she’s more experienced than you are.

So, ladies, if you’re with a guy and he failed on the job… don’t prematurely jump to conclusions and assume that it has anything to do with your body. Instead, try to act normal around him, remember his ego is taking a serious beating. For what it’s worth… avoid asking questions pertaining to what happened in the bedroom.

In fact, it would be great if you could do little things to make him feel comfortable. That’s the key. When you’re around him, try to be affectionate… even if he’s not the type to reciprocate. If he’s watching TV on the couch… jump on him, wrap your arms around him, and give him a loud sloppy kiss… especially if you have on lipstick. It really helps if he understands that you really care about him, and it’s not just about sex. Help him to feel comfortable.

And guys, if you’re in a position where your dick failed you. Try not to be too hard on yourself. There’s no denying that it’s a very embarrassing moment… but we all go through it at some point. Don’t be in a rush to get back in the bedroom to redeem yourself; that’s the worst thing you could possibly do. Remember, sex is 70% mental; 30% physical. Take your time and proceed when you’re good and ready.

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 Any picture featured on this site unless otherwise stated, I claim no credit for. The use of images are for aesthetics only and are taken from various websites. If there is a picture that belongs to you and is not credited, please contact me (chris.paul.lai@gmail.com). I will either credit it or remove it. 

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Why A Woman Needs A Real Man

machoAs a man, you have to be macho all the time; there are no day-offs. Because when you inevitably find yourself in certain situations, you have to be able to man up. For example, when you’re at the club and you accidentally step on someone’s shoes, he needs to know that “him cah bad you up”.

Similarly, when you’re in a relationship, it’s important to be macho because, ultimately, every girl wants a real man. She wants a guy who will challenge her… one who when she begins to act up, will firmly grip her arms, look into her eyes and tell her to “calm down”. But whatever you do, I repeat, whatever you do… don’t ever tell her she’s over reacting… or else she’s going to get crazy.

A real man would never physically abuse a woman but he has to know how to effectively take command of messy situations. He has to understand when he’s required to be assertive because, believe it or not, this is an attractive feature.

However, since relationships are dynamic, his ability to be assertive should not just be limited to quelling arguments. Taking control of his woman should be embedded in his thoughts; it should become his reflex action. And it begins with his willingness to do all the little things that will make her feel secure.

Every man should be macho in his girl’s eyes. You should be able to fix a door, lift heavy furniture, change the oil in her car… and, of course, lift her up. These are some of the more obvious things that you are expected to do. And you know this very well. But sometimes, it’s easy to forget how to be macho with the little things. Or, perhaps, you’re too concerned with how others may view you. Imagine… you let other people dictate how you function in your relationship. And the truth is… real men couldn’t give a shit about what others think about them.

So, when you are at the movies, it’s cool to hold your girl’s hand. It’s even cooler if she feels comfortable enough to snuggle into your arms, and rest her head on your shoulder. Now, I’m not suggesting that you need to be overly affectionate in public because it can get annoying… really annoying. But a little affection can’t be a bad thing. And surely, you shouldn’t be worried that another man will look at you and think you are “soft”. Incidentally, that guy who you’re worried about, would happily exchange places with you and openly caress your girl.

Simply put… you have to be consistently macho around your girl – always on standby. Here’s a well-documented fact: most women like to overthink. Actually, on second thought, all women like to overthink. So, when you see her absentmindedly staring through the window, you should hold her from behind, put your arms around her and tenderly kiss her neck.

You see… when you hold your woman… she will feel desired, she will feel supported, but more importantly, she will feel secure in your arms.  And for her, it doesn’t get more manly that that.

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 Any picture featured on this site unless otherwise stated, I claim no credit for. The use of images are for aesthetics only and are taken from various websites. If there is a picture that belongs to you and is not credited, please contact me (chris.paul.lai@gmail.com). I will either credit it or remove it. 

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Your Girl Is Putting On Weight; How Do You Tell Her

Couple having relationship problems

As a girl increases in age, the numbers on her scale tend to follow. Sometimes it’s barely noticeable, other times it’s more obvious. Getting old sucks. The reality is this… chances are, the body she had in her 20s will not be the same in her 30s. And oh yeah, let’s not forget how difficult it is for a girl to get back in shape after giving birth to a munchkin.

As men, we have high expectations for our women. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting your girl to be super-hot. After all, it’s likely you began dating her because that perpetual summer body she had instantly turned you on.  Initially, we’re attracted to beauty not personality.

Now, ladies, I know you’re probably whispering under your breaths “men are shallow”. And you’re right. But you need to understand something. When your body looks good, it’s natural for us to be drawn to you. When you come out of the shower with your towel wrapped around you, sit on the bed, and apply your body cream… our thing will get hard like a baseball bat. We’ll lie in bed, stare in admiration, and eagerly wait to touch you in all the right places.

When we’re attracted to you, we’re also more willing to cuddle. Why? Because we like how your body feels. When we’re watching a movie, it feels right to put our arms around you, pull you close and spontaneously kiss you on the neck.

And sure, we can be a little shallow at times. But let me tell you. When we go out, and you’re looking hot, it’s good for our egos. We like to know that we’re out with this hottie. We like to know that other men think you’re hot. We like to know that other women think you’re hot. Don’t question it. Just take my word for it.

Ladies, did I forget to mention that when you’re in shape, it’s good for your confidence. Yeah, when you feel sexy, you’ll have a certain demeanour… and that makes you even sexier. And this confidence filters into other areas of your life. You may even find that on a whole you’ve become more productive. You just feel good about yourself.

Now, that being said… gentlemen if you’re in a relationship where your girl is getting a little overweight, and it bothers you because you’d like to see her looking her best, or you’re genuinely concerned that it’s not good for her health… here’s something to consider.

Honestly, you cannot tell her that she’s getting fat. Never tell a girl that she’s fat. It would be equivalent to her saying “you’re lame in bed”. And a comment like that would make any man insecure… for life.

So again, don’t ever tell a girl that she’s fat. There’s no need to crush her self-esteem.

You can, however, encourage her to exercise with you. Perhaps you could randomly bring up the gym topic in a conversation “I never know Fit Farm was just $7,000 a month… I think I’m going to sign up.” She may show some interest, and you can take it from there.

Or maybe you could ask her to go jogging with you. And hopefully, she responds favourably. However, if she’s being difficult, you’re going to have to take control of the situation. Tell her kindly “Babes, I need a work-out partner… so we’ll go for a run on Saturday” … You can let her choose the time, that way she’ll feel like she has a say in the matter.

So, ladies, if your man is subtly encouraging you to exercise, please don’t take it the wrong way and make it an issue. Instead, embrace the opportunity to bond with your guy in a different setting, embrace the opportunity to live a healthier lifestyle, embrace the opportunity to regain your confidence.

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 Any picture featured on this site unless otherwise stated, I claim no credit for. The use of images are for aesthetics only and are taken from various websites. If there is a picture that belongs to you and is not credited, please contact me (chris.paul.lai@gmail.com). I will either credit it or remove it. 

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When Your Girl Is Looking Good; Here’s Why You Should Tell her

A happy African American man and woman couple in their thirties sitting at home together cuddling & laughing.

Men have all kinds of ridiculous expectations. We have traditional ones: we expect her to cook, clean and wash. We also have modern ones: she must have a degree, she must have a good job, she must have a second degree. And if we have children… we want her to take care of them. We’re not going to change diapers at 2:00 am. Actually, we’re not going to change diapers, period. What an unreasonable bunch we are.

And, last but not least, we all have the ultimate expectation. We want a pretty girl… and we want her to look good all the time. Actually, in a perfect world, we want a drop dead gorgeous girl, but life isn’t perfect, so we’re cool with pretty.

But why do we need a pretty girl? Well, we enjoy having sex with someone with certain physical attributes. We like it when other men stare at her in admiration, and acknowledge that we’re the boss.  We also love it when other girls remark “your girlfriend is so pretty.” Basically, we are shallow.

Now, being shallow is by no means a good thing. But throughout our lives, we’ve been socialized that way. So, it’s difficult to make a 180 degree turn overnight. We can, however, take baby steps to improve our relationships. And we can start by being more appreciative.

Okay, so we want a super-hot girl. Fine.

We need to, however, understand what it takes for a woman to look her best. Well, it begins with her having to go to the hairdresser, and maybe sitting under that alien-looking helmet that blows hot air. So, her head is on fire for hours.

Then we have the whole make-up saga. Applying all that powder on her face must be annoying. It must even be more annoying, if the place is hot, and she has to constantly visit the restroom, to reapply. Like, how do you have all that powder on your face and not want to sneeze?

And we could go and on… we could talk about the stress that goes into selecting a dress. And if that’s not enough, we could speak about the stuff that complements the dress (nails, handbag, and accessories). And how could we ever forget about heels. I honestly don’t know how women wear them all night. Walking home in football boots is uncomfortable enough.

That being said, it’s important to show some appreciation.

When you pick her up to go to the movies … it makes a big difference if you say to her “you look really pretty … is that a new top?” You’d be surprised to know how much of an impact you can make by noticing the little things. And it makes a bigger difference if you put your arms around her, and pull her close. Because when you’re affectionate with your girl, she can tell that you’re still attracted to her. And your affection will make her feel desired.

If you’ve made plans to go out for dinner, and she’s taking forever to get ready… try to be understanding.  Sure, it’s a little annoying when you have to wait… but perfection takes time. Half an hour later, when she finally comes up to you and says “I’m ready”… just look at her and smile. And when she says “what?” … just reply “you look beautiful.”

Imagine if you played football… and you trained really hard… and scored 3 goals in the semi-finals. After the game, your coach did not even congratulate you on your outstanding performance. How would that make you feel? The truth is, it may affect your confidence going into the finals. After all, even the best players need to feel appreciated, or else they’ll start looking at other clubs.

Every girl wants to be complimented by their guy. So don’t listen to women who say silly stuff like “I dress up to look good for myself.” That is a load of bullshit. If she’s home alone, do you think she’s going to get her hair done, put on makeup and dress up to watch her favourite TV series? In fact, she’ll do quite the opposite… she’ll take off her bra, let down her hair and put on the most worn-out t-shirt.

And by the way, if you happen to see her in this relaxed state… it’s pretty cool if you let her know how sexy she is. Women have this way of looking hot, when they’re not even trying. And it’s okay to let her know.

Women don’t read minds. How ironic.

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 Any picture featured on this site unless otherwise stated, I claim no credit for. The use of images are for aesthetics only and are taken from various websites. If there is a picture that belongs to you and is not credited, please contact me (chris.paul.lai@gmail.com). I will either credit it or remove it. 

 

 

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