Tag: girlfriend

  • When Your Girl Is Looking Good; Here’s Why You Should Tell her

    A happy African American man and woman couple in their thirties sitting at home together cuddling & laughing.

    Men have all kinds of ridiculous expectations. We have traditional ones: we expect her to cook, clean and wash. We also have modern ones: she must have a degree, she must have a good job, she must have a second degree. And if we have children… we want her to take care of them. We’re not going to change diapers at 2:00 am. Actually, we’re not going to change diapers, period. What an unreasonable bunch we are.

    And, last but not least, we all have the ultimate expectation. We want a pretty girl… and we want her to look good all the time. Actually, in a perfect world, we want a drop dead gorgeous girl, but life isn’t perfect, so we’re cool with pretty.

    But why do we need a pretty girl? Well, we enjoy having sex with someone with certain physical attributes. We like it when other men stare at her in admiration, and acknowledge that we’re the boss.  We also love it when other girls remark “your girlfriend is so pretty.” Basically, we are shallow.

    Now, being shallow is by no means a good thing. But throughout our lives, we’ve been socialized that way. So, it’s difficult to make a 180 degree turn overnight. We can, however, take baby steps to improve our relationships. And we can start by being more appreciative.

    Okay, so we want a super-hot girl. Fine.

    We need to, however, understand what it takes for a woman to look her best. Well, it begins with her having to go to the hairdresser, and maybe sitting under that alien-looking helmet that blows hot air. So, her head is on fire for hours.

    Then we have the whole make-up saga. Applying all that powder on her face must be annoying. It must even be more annoying, if the place is hot, and she has to constantly visit the restroom, to reapply. Like, how do you have all that powder on your face and not want to sneeze?

    And we could go and on… we could talk about the stress that goes into selecting a dress. And if that’s not enough, we could speak about the stuff that complements the dress (nails, handbag, and accessories). And how could we ever forget about heels. I honestly don’t know how women wear them all night. Walking home in football boots is uncomfortable enough.

    That being said, it’s important to show some appreciation.

    When you pick her up to go to the movies … it makes a big difference if you say to her “you look really pretty … is that a new top?” You’d be surprised to know how much of an impact you can make by noticing the little things. And it makes a bigger difference if you put your arms around her, and pull her close. Because when you’re affectionate with your girl, she can tell that you’re still attracted to her. And your affection will make her feel desired.

    If you’ve made plans to go out for dinner, and she’s taking forever to get ready… try to be understanding.  Sure, it’s a little annoying when you have to wait… but perfection takes time. Half an hour later, when she finally comes up to you and says “I’m ready”… just look at her and smile. And when she says “what?” … just reply “you look beautiful.”

    Imagine if you played football… and you trained really hard… and scored 3 goals in the semi-finals. After the game, your coach did not even congratulate you on your outstanding performance. How would that make you feel? The truth is, it may affect your confidence going into the finals. After all, even the best players need to feel appreciated, or else they’ll start looking at other clubs.

    Every girl wants to be complimented by their guy. So don’t listen to women who say silly stuff like “I dress up to look good for myself.” That is a load of bullshit. If she’s home alone, do you think she’s going to get her hair done, put on makeup and dress up to watch her favourite TV series? In fact, she’ll do quite the opposite… she’ll take off her bra, let down her hair and put on the most worn-out t-shirt.

    And by the way, if you happen to see her in this relaxed state… it’s pretty cool if you let her know how sexy she is. Women have this way of looking hot, when they’re not even trying. And it’s okay to let her know.

    Women don’t read minds. How ironic.

    Click on the image below to check out my eBook, To Feel Like This Again.

    If you need to contact me, email me at chris.paul.lai@gmail.com

     Any picture featured on this site unless otherwise stated, I claim no credit for. The use of images are for aesthetics only and are taken from various websites. If there is a picture that belongs to you and is not credited, please contact me (chris.paul.lai@gmail.com). I will either credit it or remove it. 

  • How To Know When It’s TIME To Spend The Rest Of Your Life With Her

    picccc1

    At what point do you become certain that you want to spend the rest of your life with her. Maybe after 3 years … maybe after 6 months.  How will you know if you are making the right decision? It’s impossible to know for sure if your relationship will last the test of time but what if you were able to make a decision… in retrospect. It’s often said that hindsight is 2020.  So, if you can visualize the future… you can look back in the past from that point in time. Love undermines physics.

    The year is 2080

    The pain is unbearable… the physician thinks that analgesics will provide relief but the cancer affects the lungs not the heart. You miss her dearly. If you could only see her one more time… If only you could see. Being visually impaired means that you are no longer able to look at the graficture (a type of hologram that replaced the picture in the 2040s)… you’re not even sure if the graficture is still working.

    The year is 2070

    The tears are fairly controlled at church. Maybe reality hasn’t hit yet.  You still think you’re going on the cruise to the Caribbean next month.  But as the coffin is lowered into the earth… you can no longer control yourself.

    The year is 2060

    You are super excited to take your granddaughter to see the latest 5-D animated-film (movie-goers can actually become a part of the show and change the course of the ending). At the end of the night, to see your granddaughter give your wife a big hug and say “I love you grandma”… is a little overwhelming. You’re seconds away from receiving two hugs from two of the most important persons in your life.

    The year is 2050

    For the last 2 years, you and your wife really wanted to go on a cruise to the Caribbean. But you both agreed that it’s more important for your son to complete his degree. Even though your son forgets to call sometimes to say hi … it was worth the sacrifice to see him on stage collecting his diploma.

    The year is 2040

    You still don’t understand why she wears 5-inch heels but as long as she gives you a good dance… you’re cool. You may not have the same energy level as before but the passion still remains. When you were a young man, you hoped that after a great night of partying… you would get lucky. Now, you realize how lucky you are to hold her closely till the alarm clock makes its usual annoying sound. Where is the damn snooze button?

    The year is 2030

    You still hope that one day she is able to get ready in less than two hours. But you prefer that she takes the time to ensure that she is comfortable with how she looks… even if you made dinner reservations for 8:00pm. In all fairness… you still don’t know the difference between the big spoon and the little spoon.

    The year is 2020

    You’re still very enthusiastic about your relationship. All the little things you did in the courting stages… you continue to do. You realize that you will never be the perfect husband but you will make every effort to keep improving.

    Click on the image below to check out my eBook, To Feel Like This Again.

    Thanks for reading! Be sure to check out my other articles on the blog (to the right, under Archives).

    If you have any questions, feel free to send me a message via Facebook or you can email me at chris.paul.lai@gmail.com

    Any picture featured on this site unless otherwise stated, I claim no credit for. The use of images are for aesthetics only and are taken from various websites. If there is a picture that belongs to you and is not credited, please contact me (chris.paul.lai@gmail.com). I will either credit it or remove it.

  • Why It’s Important For Your Girlfriend To Cry In Your Relationship

    Close up of woman crying

    It’s important to do fun stuff with your girlfriend. Go out for drinks, watch a movie, random beach trips. Keep doing the things you did when you were courting her and never become complacent. If you really care about your girlfriend, you should constantly improve in your relationship. It’s hard work… sometimes more than you can ever imagine.

    Engaging your girlfriend in fun-loving activities is essential to her happiness but there is so much more to experience. She has a wealth of emotions that will need to be nurtured in difficult times. You also need to accept that you, too, can be vulnerable – that you are able to connect in ways that that will allow your insecurities to become the topic of conversation… ways that words can’t describe.

    Emotions will foster a deeper connection. There are times when she may be going through a very difficult period. It could be an unexpected illness in the family, unfair treatment at work, difficulty with tuition for next semester, fear of failing a final exam, going through an unexpected pregnancy. She needs to more than just talk… she needs to let it all out.  The tears that have been restrained by her efforts to remain strong should take its natural course.

    She will feel a little better after getting everything off her chest. As she sniffs, teary-eyed, shuffles in your arms and tightens her grip… a gentle kiss on the forehead will help make her feel safe. You may not have all the answer but you can provide support.

    The next day (or weekend), a romantic dinner is always a nice way to cheer her up. Sushi is her favourite meal and the ambience will set the mood for a memorable night. Try to discuss things that she is interested in. Maybe she likes to paint … maybe she’s into fashion. And there’s no harm in remembering some of the wonderful moments that you’ve both shared in the relationship. Taking a walk down memory lane can lead to something magical.

    The restaurant manager probably wants you to leave after an hour but surely the night is not over. The beach is usually open 24/7. So why not take a drive there? A romantic walk with a bottle of Moscato  (and two wine glasses) while you walk aimlessly to the perfect spot is pretty cool.  It’s even cooler if you give her a piggyback ride.

    Along the way… talk about stuff that induces laughter. If you’re not that great at giving jokes, I’m sure you have many embarrassing stories that you could share. Stories that would make her laugh till she cries.  Sometimes… it’s not what you say… it’s how you say it.

    When the laughter begins to subside, hold her closely and keep her warm as she trembles in the wind. Express how much she really means to you and don’t hold back on your emotions. Let down your guard and expose your feelings. If you are genuine, she will be unable to control the tears from forming… and the kiss that follows will be one to remember for the rest of her life.

    Click on the image below to check out my eBook, To Feel Like This Again.

    Thanks for reading! Be sure to check out my other articles on the blog (to the right, under Archives).

    If you have any questions, feel free to send me a message via Facebook or you can email me at chris.paul.lai@gmail.com

    Any picture featured on this site unless otherwise stated, I claim no credit for. The use of images are for aesthetics only and are taken from various websites. If there is a picture that belongs to you and is not credited, please contact me (chris.paul.lai@gmail.com). I will either credit it or remove it.