Some men take the opportunity to be really stupid on February 14 while others are just oblivious. Either way, it is selfish to act nonchalantly on such a significant day. So, before you create all kinds of idiocies to justify not celebrating Valentine’s Day… consider her feelings. If you can’t be a good boyfriend on Valentine’s Day then you sure as hell won’t be a good husband on Mother’s Day.
1. Don’t break up with her close to the day over some petty issue. Only an asshole would do something like this. That’s not cool.
2. Some women downplay their expectations on the day to avoid disappointment. So, she may say something like “Valentine’s Day is not that big of a deal”… They do it partly because you haven’t really been that great of a boyfriend. It’s kinda like a child not really expecting a birthday gift from a worthless father.
3. Absolutely no last minute shopping. The typical man thinks that turquoise is blue… so choosing a gift on February 13 at 9:30pm is out of the question. Throughout the relationship, you should have been listening to her for clues. Search your memory like Bing… but if it returns zero results then pick up the phone and call her bestie. Let’s not trivialize the significance of a present … it’s imperative that you choose a sweet gift. You have failed if she sends her friend a message like this “I didn’t really like it… but it’s the thought that counts”… F**k the thought, get it right. Try not to be a disappointment like Arsenal Football Club.
4. Don’t buy lingerie. The day is not about you.
5. Getting something similar to last year is a no-no. The pretty drop earrings that you bought last year is basically the same thing as the elegant hoop earrings that you are contemplating to purchase. It’s not about cost, be creative.
6. Yay! You bought only chocolate on V-day. You were so thoughtful that you did something cliché. On your birthday, how would you feel if she only gave you a piece of cake? Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good move to buy chocolate … but it would be even better if you spent quality time with her — whether it’s a nice romantic walk in the park or a back rub or preparing a meal together. It takes zero effort to walk into a store and buy a box of chocolate (unless of course, the cashier line is ridiculously long).
7. Don’t be the numpty who says “Why do I need one day out of the year to show that I care about my girlfriend?”… I wouldn’t even waste time trying to explain this. On second thought … if it’s important to her … is it so hard to give of yourself?
7.5 Okay, the prices on the menu are more expensive than you imagined. Include a little tax and service charge and tip and before you know it your bank account is empty. It doesn’t matter… under no circumstance must she pay half (0.5) of the bill. Choose a restaurant that you can afford. This is not the night to go dutch.
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